Wednesday, December 3, 2008

How To Gain Weight

* Buy Company's Coming Cookbooks and make all the casseroles that involve potatoes, cheese, and cream sauces

* Stop drinking Diet Pepsi and switch to regular Pepsi because you read a very scary email telling you all about deadly aspartame.

*Make macaroni and cheese made with homo milk and cheese for Sophia and eat what she doesn't eat and then some.

*Avoid full length mirrors

*Become addicted to Winter White Oreos and Mint Chocolate covered

*Eat when you are stressed/bored/happy or any other emotion

*Don't exercise because it is so windy and cold outside

*Drink a Slimfast in good attempts to eat less then become so hungry you eat a whole other lunch on top of it

*Wear stretchy pants all day so you don't realize your jeans no longer fit

Yup that about sums it up...and why I almost had a heart attack when I casually stepped on the scale today.


The Crocks said...

Oh girlfriend, I hear you!
Loud and clear!
And I'm pretty much doing all of those same things...pajama pants are my best friend! Not to mention the comfort level...I mean, they don't make jeans like they used to! Or maybe that's just because mine are so tight, you may actually think I'm pregnant again! Which I very much am NOT!

So anyway, you're not alone. :D Eat some more Oreos, girl! You deserve it!!

Heather @ boy, girl, and a pug said...

Sorry about the weight gain. But those Oreos sound delish:)

amanda said...

thinking i now need to get the bean up from her nap and go get some oreos. seriously my stomach just growled!!

Jen said...

I can totally relate. I'm really scared to get on the scale. I've been avoiding it but I can tell my clothes are fitting tighter. :(

Christy said...

I CANNOT have cookies in the house, or I will eat them all. It is a sickness. I can't even buy those little sesame street cookies for the kids, because I will eat those too.

I drink regular Coca Cola too. Diet sucks ass. I would rather drink plain old water than drink diet.

And that is why I'll never be skinny.

Scrappy Girl said...

I saw peppermint oreos in the store the other day...sounds yummy!